The front-page headlines of newspapers have for some years now been moving ever lower, displaced by a line of ‘Reader Offers’ and ‘Win a Meal’ boxes. In our local paper last week, it was over half-way down the page. I felt that a protest was called for, and wrote to the Editor at their offices in Market Square.
On behalf of the Society
For Saving Fallen Headlines,
I pen this hurried note to meet
Your newspaper’s tight deadlines.
Sir, here is why our members
All flew into a rage:
Your last-week’s front-page headline
Was half-way down the page!
That poor, defenceless line of text
Had no way to complain.
On her behalf, our members trust
It won’t occur again.
For if it does, Sir, be aware,
That we’ll turn up in force
To demonstrate in Market Square
(Quite peaceably, of course).
I hope it will not come to that;
I hope you’ll not frustrate us.
Please act before it is too late –
Give headlines back their status.