As parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles well know, most children come with more energy than their bodies can hold. Here’s a possible solution:
Whoever invented children (not yet identified)
Made their bodies far too small for the energy inside.
The surplus oozes out of them as they run and jump and shout;
They bounce around and tumble over, and things get thrown about . . .
But what if we could harness this extra energy
By fitting them with Smart Clothes that charged a battery?
(Piezoelectric shoes1, worn hour after hour
With triboelectric underclothes2, could generate much power.)
Then, with a mains inverter, you’d plug the battery in,
And sell that stored-up energy to the Grid. It’s win-win-win!
There’s no-emissions, fuel is saved, and climate change is slowed;
And the Grid’s own Feed-In Tariff will pay you what you’re owed.